True intuitive expertise is learned from prolonged experience with good feedback on mistakes.
–Daniel Kahneman

Those who know me know I am a huge advocate for ongoing feedback and performance previews, as opposed to reviews. I believe if dialogue and communication are open, clear, honest and consistent between all parties, there should be no surprises. Feedback given and received regularly is imperative and needs to be provided by you, as the leader, and also from your team to you and each other.

Working with a client recently, we discussed the ways the organisation she works for, gives and receives feedback. Mariana, my client, shared with me that as an organisation they have what they have what’s called “Stay Interviews”. These are regularly run, jealously protected pieces of time dedicated to giving and getting feedback. I say “jealously” protected, as I cannot tell you how many times I see feedback and coaching sessions cancelled due to so-called conflicting priorities. As a leader, people need to be an OR, not an AND, in our day to day function; people before progress, I say.

I love the concept of “stay” interviews, and as we are all well aware, happy people usually don’t leave a company. If we can know when happiness, commitment and energy drops, at least we can proactively do and drive what needs to be done.

“Stay” interviews create a space for awareness and growth, with time dedicated to a few structured questions and the headspace for both parties to be present, engaged and ready to contribute.

Success to “Stay” Interviews

Make them Regular:

Don't make these a one-off event, name them and lock them in as you would with any meeting. Consistent catch-ups will breed momentum, rapport and openness. Be committed and don’t cancel or back out – people are your priority. Look at what it will cost you and the organisation if you’re not all-in.

Aside from regular coaching, mentoring and team catch-ups, I would suggest doing these every 6-8 weeks, for 20-30 minutes per person.

A bit like exercise, once in the habit, these will become the way you do things.

Plan the Purpose:

Make sure each person knows “why” the interviews are occurring.

Giving each other open and honest feedback to feed-forward is imperative.

People only buy into anything if there is something in it for them – we are the same, so ensure you spend time setting the scene and expectations around this. Maybe run a facilitated team session on the whole concept of “Stay Interviews”? You need buy-in to make this worthwhile.

Success in the Structure:

Don't dilute what could be an insightful conversation by having idle chit-chat. Respect their time and expect the same in return. Plan out a few great questions to get the responses that will benefit all; here are a few examples below, but remember to make these your own!

  • What is lighting you up in your role right now?
  • Are you satisfying these motivators?
  • How are you feeling about your role?
  • What is your overall job satisfaction?
  • How can I improve this?
  • What do you like about working here?
  • What keeps you here?
  • What do you like the most / least?
  • Where are you getting the most traction?
  • What and/or who is frustrating you?
  • What is stretching and growing you?
  • How are you feeling recognised?
  • What is your preferred style for feedback?
  • What could you change or do differently?
  • As a team, what could bring us closer to being a “Superteam?”
  • What’s your greatest learning to date?
  • How could you share this with the broader team?
  • Confidence, capability and capacity – rate each one, 1-5?
  • What needs to change and be actioned?
  • As your manager, what could I do differently or change?
  • If you could change anything about the way I lead, how would that look (leading team, recognition, coaching, feedback)?

In a growth mindset, challenges are exciting rather than threatening. So rather than thinking, ‘oh, I’m going to reveal my weaknesses’, you say, ‘wow, here’s a chance to grow’. –Carol Dweck

Flip it Around:

Now it’s your turn – let the team interview you! We all know how valuable disclosure is and your team will thank you for it! From experience, you can do this 1:1 or as a team, ensuring everyone contributes.

Follow Up:

The interviews will leave you all with golden nuggets of opportunity and progress – don’t let this slip and be forgotten! If you do, not only will this be a waste of time and resources, but it will also dim the commitment of future conversations. All of those involved need to take accountability and ownership and action what needs to be done as part of an overall ongoing development plan.

I’d love to hear how you implement “Stay” interviews into your organisation!

Be limitless!