What is more important?

Late last month, I was working with a leader who asked me:

[bctt tweet=”“What is more important, how people want to see me or me being the real me?”” username=”Renee_Giarrusso”]

Our discussion opened up around the difference between “character” and “reputation” and what this actually means.

Character v Reputation: the main differences:

[bctt tweet=”Your character is the essence of who you really are and allocating the time and effort into knowing this and being this, is vitally important to your success in any role and in life in general.” username=”Renee_Giarrusso”]

[bctt tweet=”Your reputation is the perception of what others think of you and too often I see individuals focus on this and not the heart of which they really are, their character.” username=”Renee_Giarrusso”]

Breaking up is hard to do…

It’s a bit like catching up with a friend who you may have known your entire life, and now you value different things and find it hard to have the conversations that used to flow so effortlessly. Gone are the days you could talk for hours on end where there was never enough time to share your stories, commonalities and viewpoints on life. Something has changed, maybe it’s you, maybe it’s them, but the point here is if you were to try to maintain the depth and level of conversation that used to flow so easily, it won’t come naturally. You may have heard the term ‘he or she is high maintenance”, in this context means that you have to work hard being with that person.  

It’s almost like an unspoken breakup, so to speak.

We all change

Maybe your values or priorities have changed, and therefore you may not feel congruent in your interactions with them anymore. It’s exhausting not being the real you, and it takes time and effort to catch up and be with this person.  If you compare this to being the real you in your professional life and being congruent to whom you really are, the “true”, you will come through, and your “true” reputation will flow from this.

Character comes from within, it is internal, and I believe is built by you

So what makes up your character:

  • the ethics you hold
  • your values
  • your moral and integrity

All of the above elements that make up your character take time to build. 

Your reputation is external

Your reputation is built very quickly, as it based on the perceptions and opinions others have of you.

Others, not you, determine your reputation so therefore your reputation is out of your control.

[bctt tweet=”I am a firm believer we should focus on the things we can control so take some time to understand your true character, what you believe in and stand for and focus on this.” username=”Renee_Giarrusso”]

Love to hear your thoughts and insights on this…..

To being Limitless…




For more of my tips on how change can equate to growth, get in touch. I look forward to working with you in the future!

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Renée is a mentor, coach, expert facilitator and keynote speaker. She is the author of ‘Limitless Leadership’ and co-author of ‘Leaders of Influence’.

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